Behaving Like an Upperclassman

As many of you know, the girls and I have been spending a good bit more time with Mom up here in WV – helping her in whatever way we can. One benefit of the extra time with her has been hearing her reminisce every now and then. At ninety-eight years of age, her mind is still quite sharp concerning her day-to-day activities but when it comes to her past, we are realizing that much of the details have been forgotten. There are a few events from years ago, however, that she still remembers quite clearly and enjoys telling us about. Memories such as when she trusted Christ as her Saviour, when and where she met Dad, a few things about her mother (who died when Mom was 17), etc. There are also a few sad memories that haven’t left her such as when her oldest brother drowned when her two youngest brothers were led away by a cult – recollections that, to this day, still bring sadness to her face. All of these incidents that I have named are what we have heard Mom talk about during our time with her these last few months…incidents that undoubtedly made a huge impact on her life.

In the midst of all these memories stands another one that, to be honest, doesn’t seem to “rank” with all the others – salvation…future husband…tragic death of a brother, etc. But apparently, it made a big enough impact in Mom’s life to have stayed with her. When Mom talks about this particular memory, she always ends by referring to the following Scripture:

“At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge. Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me…” II Timothy 4:16,17

The memory I am referring to goes back to Mom’s school days. One day, as she was walking out of her school, a group of students ran up to her and began snowballing her. At that moment, an upperclassman went over to Mom and stood beside her, and, in Mom’s words, “they scattered”.

That’s it, folks! That’s an incident in Mom’s life that has not left her for over 80 years now! Compared to the other memories, this one seems pretty insignificant, doesn’t it?

The above verses from II Timothy were a part of my Bible reading this morning and have stayed on my mind today. I don’t know anything about the upperclassman that stood beside Mom that day – other than the fact that there was a time when she knew what it was like to be one of the younger students. And, there was likely a time when she was bullied as well. I say this because of how she responded to Mom being bullied. Life experience has a way of teaching us compassion, doesn’t it?

Can I be a little transparent here? I know what it’s like to be in Mom’s shoes. Because of that, I also know what it’s like to be in the shoes of the upperclassman. I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of bullying. And, I know what it’s like to stand beside someone who is being bullied. I’m sure that many of you can testify to the same experiences. Neither position is comfortable or popular.  

A few thoughts for this evening…

First, are you experiencing unjust treatment? Are you in the midst of being “snowballed”? Friend, even if an “upperclassman” does not come and stand by your side you can be assured that you are not alone. If you are saved and by God’s grace doing your best to live for the Lord, you can say just as Paul said, “the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me”.

Second, do you know what it’s like to be bullied? If so, have you allowed your own experiences to cause you to step up and be the upperclassman – or have you forgotten the pain you suffered? Have you conveniently looked the other way for fear of being associated and thus being bullied yourself? Or, even worse, have you behaved like the younger school children by joining in on the attack? Be careful about being indifferent to the hurts of others. Remember, life experience has a way of teaching us compassion. If we fail to show compassion on our own, we most likely have a round of snowballs headed our way.

And finally, how would a ninety-eight-year-old lady remember you? Again, I marvel that this childhood experience has stayed in Mom’s mind all these years but it obviously made a difference in her life. In the life of one who has been “pushed around”, how will you one day be remembered – as an upperclassman or as a schoolchild hurling the snowballs?  

“And of some have compassion, making a difference” Jude 1:22

“Compassion costs. It is easy enough to argue, criticize and condemn, but redemption is costly, and comfort draws from the deep. Brains can argue, but it takes heart to comfort.” ~ Samuel Chadwick