Anger/Bitterness,  Grace,  Patience,  Peace,  The Tongue

Just Leave It Off

“The beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water: therefore leave off contention, before it be meddled with.” Proverbs 17:14

The above verse was one topic of discussion during our Bible time this morning and Matthew Henry’s comments are as follows:

{Here is, 1. The danger that there is in the beginning of strife. One hot word, one peevish reflection, one angry demand, one spiteful contradiction, begets another, and that a third, and so on, till it proves like the cutting of a dam; when the water has got a little passage it does itself widen the breach, bears down all before it, and there is then no stopping it, no reducing it. 2. A good caution inferred thence, to take heed of the first spark of contention and to put it out as soon as ever it appears. Dread the breaking of the ice, for, if once broken, it will break further; therefore leave it off, not only when you see the worst of it, for then it may be too late, but when you see the first of it. Resist its earliest display. Leave it off even before it be meddled with; leave it off, if it were possible, before you begin.}

Another verse we referred to was Proverbs 20:3,

“It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling.”

In both verses, we see that, contrary to the belief of many, the “badge of honor” belongs to the man or woman who can refrain from arguing. In fact, we read that continual strife in a believer is one sign of carnality. “For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men.” I Corinthians 3:3  On the other hand, “Salty Christians” are those whose desire is peace among the brethren, “Salt is good: but if the salt have lost his saltness, wherewith will ye season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace one with another.” Mark 9:50

A good question for each of us to ask would be, “Does the atmosphere suddenly become peaceful when I leave the room?” Proverbs 22:10 reminds us, “Cast out the scorner, and contention shall go out; yea, strife and reproach shall cease.” 

If we have someone in our lives that constantly wants to quarrel, let’s choose, by God’s grace, to be the bigger person. Abram is a good example of this where we read in Genesis 13:8, And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren.” When dealing with a contentious person, stay calm, whisper the following prayer, “Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips.” (Psalm 141:3), and if needed (and possible), just calmly walk away from the strife. The worst-case scenario would be that the person is an enemy. If that is the case, we need to remember that the Bible still commands us to pray for them. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;” Matthew 5:44  But also, we must be sure to pray for ourselves – for wisdom and grace if there would happen to be future dealings with the individual. Very often, God may allow us to see past the person’s argumentative spirit to an individual with deep hurts and insecurities. As a result, the Lord may use us to make a difference in that person’s life.

“And of some have compassion, making a difference” Jude 1:22

~ Rachel ~

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